I got the idea for this blog from an old AT&T slogan, “Reach out and touch someone,” that was originally used to promote long-distance telephone service, emphasizing the ability to connect with loved ones who were far away. We can also apply this phrase to those dealing with depression/anxiety, those in recovery, or those who simply need help of some sort.
According to the Cambridge Dictionary, the definition of the word reach is to communicate with someone in a different place. The Oxford Languages Dictionary says to stretch out an arm in a specified direction in order to touch or grasp something. How could we apply reaching out to those with various needs?
Turning Your Recovery Contacts into Lifelong Allies
When a newcomer first joins a recovery meeting, they’re typically handed a phone list featuring all present attendees. This provides the newcomer with a lifeline, someone to connect with during challenging moments. Armed with this valuable tool, the newcomer gains access to a roster of individuals who can empathize and comprehend their struggles. The effectiveness of this list, however, hinges on the newcomer’s willingness to utilize it—a crucial expectation in the recovery journey. Like any tool, the list yields results only when put into action.
Yet, the utility of this phone list extends beyond the initial stages, aiding in overcoming loneliness. It’s designed to evolve as you encounter new faces in recovery. This perpetual expansion ensures you always have someone to reach out to, irrespective of whether you’ve achieved a decade of sobriety. Maintaining a list or a supportive group is vital for everyone, regardless of their years in recovery. I’ve witnessed individuals with substantial sobriety lose their way simply because they refused to tap into their network. It’s a tragic scenario, and I’ve even mourned the loss of a friend who succumbed to a relapse. Facing such daunting circumstances alone is an experience no one should endure.
The Liberation of Sharing Your Feelings
Some individuals can benefit from using a similar type of record to cope with their diverse difficulties in finding inner peace and serenity. Everyone must have someone to talk to from time to time. It’s extremely helpful when that person can relate to the challenges the other person is currently experiencing. Those who are struggling with anxiety, grief, and depression can benefit greatly from a list like this. If you’re anything like me, you might tend to bottle up your emotions. You may not want to share your feelings with anyone. I don’t want to impose my problems on others. I don’t want to bring others down with me. After all, they are my issues, not anyone else’s. That is what my mind tells me, at least. I can be stubborn, as you may have already noticed.
After a friend of mine was murdered in high school, dealing with loss, I shut down. I did not want to talk about it to anyone. I did not eat, I was angry, I wanted to be by myself. I did not want to reach out to anyone. My parents tried talking to me, and my friends tried talking to me, my girlfriend at the time tried talking to me. I did not want any part of it. That kind of mindset gets scary and lonely. Two months following my friend’s death, another friend of mine was killed in an automobile accident. This almost pushed me over the edge, and at that point, I reached out and got a counselor. I had to talk to someone. This helped greatly. Just having someone to listen to me felt great. It is good to talk to someone and get everything off of your chest. You will be amazed at how much difference this makes.
I hope everyone reads this next section very closely, as it could save someone else’s life. There is another side to reaching out. If you know anyone who could be struggling, please reach out to them. Let them know that you are there for them and that you want to check on them. This is huge to the person struggling.
How a Friend’s Check-Ins Saved Me
As I mentioned earlier, I don’t like asking for help. I’m quite stubborn. After I experienced a nervous breakdown in 2022, I didn’t talk about it with anyone. Amy had informed a couple of my close friends, and I was okay with that. One of those friends called me at least once a day to check on me. I cannot describe how much this made me feel. This friend made sure that I understood how important I was to them and how much they loved me. It meant a lot to me, someone who was trying to recover from a nervous breakdown.
Even though I was being stubborn and didn’t reach out to anyone, I had someone reach out to me. That made me feel like I was important to somebody. Of course, my wife and daughter were very worried about me, and they expressed how important I was to them. But, having a friend call me and check on me like that and tell me those things played a big part in giving me joy in my recovery journey. I had another friend who I’m really close to that really hurt me. They never reached out, even after they found out what was going on. They never checked on me. That really upset me, knowing that they knew what I was facing but were not there for me when I needed them the most. So, I would like to encourage you not to be that friend. Make sure you check on your friends and let them know that you love them.
Following the deaths of my best friend and both of my parents, my cousin Stacy got in touch with me. She made sure I understood how much she cared for me and how much she loved me. This was coming from a person who is currently healing from their own tragedies and trauma. Knowing that she was still available to check on me and make sure everything was alright meant a lot to me.
The Courage to Ask for Help
To all the strugglers, don’t be scared to reach out. We all need a hand sometimes. There is no shame in asking for help. You might feel alone, but you’re not. Someone’s waiting to help if you just reach out. Open up, make that move. And to the friends, don’t ignore the signs. Be the one who checks in, asks, and truly cares. Be the ear, be the friend who says, “I love you.” Look out for those dealing with loss, job struggles, home issues, or battling demons. Let them know you’re there to listen. You could save a life just by being there. I hope this blog has helped someone. I hope the person reading this blog will leave us a comment, giving us feedback. Remember, do not be afraid to ask for help. Everyone needs help from time to time. Do you have a story you would like to share with us? Do you have certain topics you would like us to discuss? Please email us at rentfreemedia@rent-freeliving.com and let us know. You can email us just to say hi if you want. We want to hear from you!