In today’s world, it can be challenging to find moments of genuine listening amidst the constant noise. When you step into a store, you’re bombarded by a cacophony of sounds – music playing overhead, people talking on their phones, TVs in the background, and the myriad of surround sound and Bluetooth speakers being tested by customers. It’s an overwhelming sensory experience that can make it difficult to concentrate and truly listen.
But the kind of listening I want to emphasize goes beyond this external noise. Beyond the clamor of the world around us, who are you really listening to? Are you taking the time to listen to the stories of your older family members, who have accrued a wealth of wisdom and experience over the years? Are you tuning in to your inner self, to the positive thoughts trying to uplift your spirit, or are you letting the barrage of negativity from the world drown them out?
Finding the Way Forward:
I’ve come across stories about older generations who grew up with the expectation never to interrupt someone older than themselves, no matter how small the age gap. When I began attending recovery meetings, I was advised to “shut up and listen.” At that point in my recovery, I had little to offer others because I was still learning the ropes. To grasp the program and process, I needed to lend an ear to the “Old Timers” who had a wealth of experience. Even now, with some progress in my recovery, I acknowledge that there will always be someone with more experience and wisdom to share as long as I’m open to listening.
When I contemplated starting a mental health blog, I delved into research. The first statistic I encountered was disheartening – only 5% of bloggers achieve success. Faced with these odds, I could have easily thrown in the towel before even beginning. But then, I uncovered a different perspective – recent studies indicate that blogging works for nearly 80% of bloggers, with 77% reporting positive results. Among bloggers who post daily, 67% consider themselves successful. Now, I have two viewpoints to consider. I can choose to dwell on the negative statistics and give up prematurely, or I can approach this endeavor with a positive attitude, hoping that our blog can make a meaningful impact in helping others navigate through challenging circumstances. Our blog isn’t driven by monetary goals; it’s a platform to assist people like us in facing tough situations and finding their way forward.
Passion Over Paycheck:
Negative thoughts can be incredibly tempting, and the world often bombards us with doubts and insecurities in an attempt to make us give up on our dreams. It’s easy to succumb to these temptations, but it’s essential to remember that success isn’t solely measured by wealth or material possessions.
I’m currently engrossed in the book “The Cabin at the End of Train” by Michael V. Ivanov, and I stumbled upon a quote in Chapter Four that struck a chord with me: “You know, when you spend too much time watching other people’s success, you forget to steer your own.” These words resonate deeply. It’s a reminder that we mustn’t get lost in observing the achievements of others to the point where we neglect our own paths.
Success doesn’t require a vault full of money. I admire those who live out their dreams and find ways to make a living without sacrificing their passions. Many of us work to enrich the already wealthy, earning a decent paycheck and providing for our families. But are we truly doing what we love, or are we locked into jobs that dictate our vacations, our time at home, and our moments with loved ones?
I find immense joy in encountering individuals who are passionate about their work and who are living their dreams. Recently, I had a dental check-up, and my dentist shared that he had been retired for a few years. Naturally, I asked him why he was still practicing. His response resonated deeply with me. He explained that he was living his dream, that while others might choose to play golf during retirement, he wanted to continue practicing dentistry on his terms. He now selects his work hours, deciding when and where he wants to practice. It’s clear that he isn’t driven by money but by his love for his profession and the desire to help others through dentistry. To me, that’s the essence of true success.
I share these thoughts because I’ve come to recognize that I have a tendency to give up too easily. There have been times when I’ve thrown in the towel before even embarking on a journey. It’s a part of my nature, and it’s something I struggle with.
If this blog never achieves what society might label as “success,” it will still hold value in my eyes. You see, most of the things I write about, I’m writing to myself. I’m not the most positive person. I grapple with doubts and often question whether I’ll ever be able to realize my dreams. There’s a looming fear that retirement might forever remain out of reach for me. And even if I were to reach that milestone, there’s another fear that I’d only enjoy a brief moment of retirement before health issues or disability would snatch it away.
These are genuine fears, the kind that keeps me up at night. However, writing about them and sharing them allows me to confront and process these concerns. It’s a form of therapy, a way to grapple with the uncertainty of the future. So, even if this blog doesn’t achieve fame or fortune, it’s already a success in its own right. It’s a chronicle of my journey, a space where I can learn from my own words, and a platform to connect with others who may share similar fears and doubts.
The Joy of Living Your Dream:
My mother retired in October 2020, and she passed away in May 2022. She spent her first seven months caring for my ailing father before his passing. Following his departure, she grieved for a year before succumbing to COVID-19. This unfortunate sequence of events is where my fear stems from. My parents never had the opportunity to savor retirement together. They toiled tirelessly throughout their lives, only to be denied the chance to relish their twilight years side by side. It is tempting to dwell on the negative aspects of this, but it’s essential to recognize that such negativity can erode our faith in what truly matters.
I must learn to heed the positive inner voice—the one assuring me of my potential for success, offering the comfort that I will be okay, and affirming that our blog endeavor is a meaningful and worthwhile pursuit. My aspiration is to eventually live out my dreams and engage in work that brings me genuine happiness rather than merely enriching those already affluent.
Terry, a wise and influential figure in my life, frequently emphasized that “Life is a series of adjustments,” highlighting our ability to choose the adjustments we wish to make. However, my fear of failure has occasionally compelled me to withdraw. The fear of falling short is something I vehemently want to avoid. I once attempted to numb my inner turmoil with alcohol, only to realize that I was merely compounding my problems for both myself and those around me. Terry’s wisdom continues to resonate with me. While he never had the opportunity to enjoy retirement, he truly savored life. He possessed an infectious enthusiasm for everything he undertook, finding joy in every moment. Terry was indeed living his dream—a testament to the value of prioritizing happiness over external opinions and material pursuits.
Choosing Positivity Over Negativity:
In the words of 1 Corinthians 10:13 ESV, “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation, he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” The choice is yours—will you heed the negative or positive influences in your life? What adjustments will you make? You can persist in a life governed by negativity, or you can opt for a life where you chase your dreams.
When you find yourself besieged by negative thoughts or overwhelmed by anxiety, pause and turn to your Higher Power in prayer. Be vigilant for the subtle spiritual cues that alert you when something is amiss, and heed them. Satan and the world may not wish to see you succeed, but your Higher Power guides you toward the right path.
I write these blogs to myself just as much as to anyone else. These are the lessons I need to internalize from friends, family, and my spiritual community. Overcoming negativity and seeking the positive is a journey worth embarking upon, as negativity only adds to stress and worry.
Psalm 51:10-13 ESV provides further guidance: “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will return to you.” Let these verses inspire you to cultivate a clean heart, embrace joy, and share the wisdom of your journey with others, leading them toward the path of light and positivity.
Do you have a story you would like to share with us? Do you just want someone to talk to? If so, feel free to email us at rentfreemedia@rent-freeliving.com